After his beatdown of Jiang Menshen, Wu Song discovers he has a new fan.
Transcript
Welcome to the Water Margin Podcast. This is episode 43.
Last time, Wu Song heard that a bully named Jiang Menshen had beaten up Shi En, the son of the warden of the penal colony where he had been exiled to. And this Jiang Menshen had taken Shi En’s business. It mattered little to Wu Song that said business was the operation of a protection money, he simply could not abide bullies, so he stomped over to said business and beat down Jiang Menshen, making him promise to return the business to Shi En and leave town right away.
As Jiang Menshen agreed to all of Wu Song’s conditions and pleaded for mercy, Shi En and about 30 stout soldiers showed up to … umm … help, which was, you know, just in time. Seeing that Wu Song had already beaten down his foe, Shi En and company were delighted as they huddled around their champion.
Wu Song said to Jiang Menshen, “The shop’s rightful owner is right here. Pack up and go have everyone come apologize to him.”
Jiang Menshen invited Wu Song and company to sit in the tavern while he tended to his demands. So By now, the floor in the tavern was all wet from the wine that was spilled during the fight. In the three giant vats, the two waiters who had tried to take on Wu Song were still struggling to get out. Jiang Menshen’s concubine, who was the first to land inside a vat courtesy of Wu Song, had just now climbed out. She had cuts on her face and forehead, and her entire lower half was soaking wet. All the rest of the staff had already scrammed.
Wu Song shouted at the remaining waiters, “You all pack up right now and leave!”
So Jiang Menshen’s men found a cart for their belongings and Jiang Menshen’s concubine. Then, the waiters who had not been injured were dispatched to invite all the leading men from the businesses in the Pleasure Forest to the tavern, where they apologized to Shi En on Jiang Menshen’s behalf. Then, Wu Song had all the fine wine in the tavern opened and served. He told Shi En to sit at the head of the table, above Jiang Menshen. Big bowls were placed in front of everyone, and the wine began to flow freely.
After a few bowls, Wu Song said, “Honored neighbors, my name is Wu Song. I committed murder in Yanggu County and was exiled here. I heard people say that this tavern was established by Shi En, the son of the warden, but that Jiang Menshen took it over by brute force. Don’t think that Shi En is my master. He and I had never met before. It’s just that I have always taken on bullies. If I see an injustice, I have to intervene, even at the risk of my life. Today, I was going to beat that Jiang Menshen to death so as to rid us of a pest. But on account of you, I’ll take a raincheck on his life. I’ve told him to leave immediately. If he does not and he runs into me again, then he’ll end up like that tiger on Jingyang Ridge.”
Everyone in attendance now realized that they were talking to the tiger slayer, so they all rose and bowed, saying, “Hero, please calm down. Let Jiang Menshen leave and return the tavern to its rightful owner.”
Jiang Menshen, of course, did not dare to make a peep. Once Shi En did an inventory and retook control of the tavern, Jiang Menshen shamefully thanked everyone and then hightailed it out of there with his luggage.
Wu Song and all the leading men of the Pleasure Forest then drank late into the night before parting ways, and Wu Song slept until mid-morning the next day. By then, Shi En’s father, the old warden, had gotten the news and had ridden out to the tavern to thank Wu Song. They drank and feasted for several days to celebrate. Meanwhile, everyone in the Pleasure Forest had heard the news that Wu Song was there, so they all came to pay their respects.
After the celebrations, the old warden left to go back to the penal colony. Shi En, meanwhile, worked on reopening his tavern slash legitimate businessmen’s club. His scouts said that Jiang Menshen and his family had disappeared to god knows where, so Shi En felt relieved and focused on business. Oh and by the way, now that everyone knew Shi En had the tiger slayer backing him, business was amazing. All the shops and gambling houses made sure to pay their tribute, with a little extra, so Shi En was raking in 50 percent more protection money than before. I guess that’s what passes for justice in this story.
Having gotten revenge and now making more coin than ever, Shi En practically worshipped Wu Song. He moved Wu Song from the penal colony to his own residence and treated him with the utmost reverence. Soon, more than a month had passed, and it was the height of autumn.
One day, Shi En and Wu Song were shooting the breeze in the tavern when a few soldiers showed up with a horse.
“Which one is Constable Wu, the tiger slayer?” they asked the host at the tavern.
Shi En recognized that these men were adjutants of Zhang (1) Mengfang (2,1), the general who commanded the garrison in the prefecture. So he asked them why they were looking for Wu Song.
“General Zhang heard that Constable Wu is a true hero, so he sent us here with a horse to fetch him,” the adjutants said. “Here are the general’s orders.”
Shi En read the orders and thought to himself, “That General Zhang is my father’s superior, so we are under his command. Wu Song is an inmate, so he’s also under the general’s jurisdiction. I have no choice but to let him go.”
So he said to Wu Song, “Brother, these men were sent by General Zhang to fetch you. He sent them with a horse. What do you think?”
“Well, since he’s asking for me, I’ll go and see what he wants,” Wu Song said. He changed into some fresh clothes, got on the horse, and left with the soldiers.
When they arrived at the general’s residence, Wu Song followed the soldiers into the main hall to see General Zhang, who was delighted to meet him. Wu Song paid his respects and stood to one side.
“I’ve heard that you are a real man, an unrivaled hero who would put his life on the line for others,” General Zhang said. “I am in need of someone in my service. Are you willing to be one of my adjutants?”
Wu Song kneeled and said, “I am but an inmate from the penal colony. I am grateful for the opportunity you are giving me. I will gladly be your groom, holding your whip and running alongside your stirrup.”
General Zhang was delighted and told his attendants to bring out wine and fruit, and he personally offered the wine to Wu Song and kept imploring him to drink until he was totally hammered. He then arranged for a room for Wu Song to rest in. The next day, the general sent men to Shi En’s house to fetch Wu Song’s belongings. From that day forth, Wu Song stayed in the general’s residence. The general would always summon Wu Song to his private quarters and treat him to wine and food. Wu Song was allowed to go everywhere in the residence, as the general treated him like a member of the family. He even had his own tailor make some fall clothes for Wu Song.
All this made Wu Song happy. He thought to himself, “This general is a rare find. He’s intent on lifting me up. The only thing is that ever since I’ve moved here, I haven’t left the general’s side, so I haven’t had time to go see Shi En. Even though he has sent some men to check on me, they couldn’t come into the general’s residence.”
But aside from that minor drawback, life was looking pretty good for Wu Song. Because he was the general’s favorite, a lot of people who needed favors from the general would come see him first, and when he relayed their requests, the general always said sure why not. And then those people would thank Wu Song with money, silks, and satin. So Wu Song bought a box woven from willow leaves to store all these gifts and kept them safely locked away.
Before you know it, it was already the middle of the eighth month, and the Mid-Autumn Festival, which was on the 15th day of the month, was upon us again. This is the holiday where people would eat outside and enjoy the full moon. And that’s what General Zhang did. He held a feast in the private quarters of his residence, under a building called the Mandarin Duck Bower. He of course invited Wu Song to come and join him and his family. Seeing that the general’s family was on hand, Wu Song drank just one cup and then turned to leave.
“Where are you going?” the general asked.
“Benefactor, since your wife and family are present, I should withdraw.”
“No, you’re mistaken,” the general said with a laugh. “I respect you as a man of honor, so I invited you here to drink with us. You’re like family, so there’s no need to withdraw.”
He then told Wu Song to sit down, but Wu Song said, “I am an inmate. I would not dare to sit next to you, benefactor.”
“Hero, why must you stand on such ceremony?” the general said. “There are no outsiders here. It’s fine to sit down.”
Wu Song tried time and again to beg off, but the general would not hear of it. Finally, Wu Song relented, bowed deeply to offer his thanks, and then sat down a good distance away from the general, and turned slightly so that he was not directly facing him, maintaining a subordinate and respectful posture.
The general ordered the maids to pour more wine for Wu Song. After five or six cups, he ordered more food to go with the wine. As the servants brought out a couple more courses, the general shot the breeze with Wu Song, chit chatting about weapons and such. In the middle of the conversation, the general said, “Wait. How can a true man drink with small cups?” So he told the servants to give Wu Song a big goblet instead. By the time the moon was shining brightly in the sky and its rays were flooding through the east window, Wu Song was buzzing big time. He forgot all about decorum and was just chugging, but the general did not mind.
Now, General Zhang summoned a maid named Yu (4) Lan (2), which meant Jade Orchid. She had a pretty round face with cherry lips, delicate eyebrows, bright eyes, and a narrow waist.
“There are no outsiders here, just my confidant, Constable Wu,” the general said to Yu Lan. “Go ahead and sing a MId-Autumn holiday song for us.”
So Yu Lan picked up a set of clappers, bowed to everyone, and then started singing in a beautiful voice. She sang a song written by Su (1) Dongpo (1,1), a famous poet and government official from the Song Dynasty. It went something like this:
When is there a bright moon?
Ask the sky, cup in hand.
Who knows what year it is
In the palaces of heaven.
Long to go there, riding the wind,
But the cold I cannot stand.
In that lofty jade firmament;
I dance alone with my shadow,
As if in another world.
With the beaded curtains rolled high,
The moonlight, streaming through the open window,
Drives away sleep.
I should not be resentful, but why
Is the moon always roundest at parting?
As people have their sorrows and joys, separating and reuniting,
So has the moon its bright and dark, waxing and waning.
Since ancient times, it has always been thus!
If we cannot for long be heart to heart,
Let us enjoy the same moon, far apart!
When she was done, she put down the clappers, bowed again, and stood to one side.
“Yu Lan, pour some wine for us,” the general said. So she picked up the bottle and first filled the cup for the general and then the general’s wife. Next she made her way over to Wu Song to fill his cup. Wu Song did not dare to look up at her, and instead put his hands out far away from his body to accept the cup without getting too close to her. Then, he raised the cup toward his host, emptied it in one gulp, and returned the cup.
Pointing at Yu Lan, General Zhang said to Wu Song, “This girl is pretty smart and clever. She is also well-versed in music and needlework. If you don’t mind her humble status, then in a few days, I will pick an auspicious day and let you marry her.”
Wu Song quickly rose, bowed, and said, “Who am I to dare to entertain thoughts of marrying someone from your household? It’s too much!”
The general laughed. “Since I have said so, I must follow through. Don’t refuse, and I will never break my promise.”
So this was turning out to be a good night for Wu Song. He had plenty of wine and now, he was promised a wife by his benefactor. So he drank another dozen cups or so and was really feeling the alcohol now. Afraid that he would say or do something improper in his inebriated state, he took his leave, and went back to his room. But he had too much wine and food in him to go to bed right away.
So what do you do when you’re too tipsy and too full to sleep? Why, have a vigorous workout of course! Wu Song took off his tunic and head scarf and grabbed a wooden staff. He went into the garden and practiced with the staff for a while. By now, it was about midnight, and he was finally ready for bed. He returned to his room and prepared to disrobe and go to sleep.
But just then, a chorus of shouts rose up from the rear garden. He listened and heard men yelling, “Thief! Thief!”
“The general thinks so highly of me. How can I not help when there’s a thief in his private quarters?” Wu Song thought to himself. So he quickly grabbed his staff and rushed toward the rear garden. He saw Yu Lan, the maid who had just been betrothed to him, rushing out in a panic. She pointed behind her and said, “A thief ran into the rear garden!”
So Wu Song gripped his staff and stomped into the rear garden. He searched around but did not see anyone. So he turned around and stomped back toward the exit.
Suddenly, in the darkness, a bench swung out right in front of him and caught his feet. Wu Song tripped and fell to the ground. In that very moment, seven or eight soldiers also appeared, shouting, “Catch the thief!” They immediately piled on top of Wu Song and tied him up.
“Hey it’s me!” Wu Song protested. But the soldiers ignored him. A moment later, the parlor was lit up with lamps, and General Zhang was sitting in the hall.
“Bring him over here!” the general shouted, and the soldiers shoved Wu Song into the hall, beating him with staffs each step of the way.
“I’m not the thief! It’s me, Wu Song,” he cried out as he was brought before the general.
As soon as the general saw Wu Song, his face was filled with anger. “You damn crook!” he cursed. “You are a criminal through and through. I tried to lift you up and never mistreated you! I even invited you to sit and drink with me just now! I was hoping to promote you and give you a position. And yet, you were engaged in this shenanigans!”
“My lord,” Wu Song shouted, “It’s not me! I came to catch the thief, but they mistook me for the thief. I am an upstanding man. I would never do such a thing!”
“Don’t you dare deny it!” the general shouted. “Take him to his room and search for the loot.”
So the soldiers brought Wu Song back to his room and started turning the place upside down. Wu Song wasn’t worried, since he knew had no stolen goods for them to find. But then, the soldiers pulled out his box made of woven willow leaves, which he had used to store the gifts he had received. When they opened it, there were clothes on top. Once the clothes were pulled away, the soldiers found a stash of silver goblets and cups underneath, probably worth about 200 taels.
Uhh … where did THAT come from?
Wu Song was dumbfounded when he saw what was in the box. Then he started shouting that he had been framed. But the soldiers ignored him and brought the box out to the hall. When General Zhang saw the contents of the box, he cursed Wu Song again.
“You damn crook! How dare you?! The loot is in your box. How can you deny it?! It’s like they say, ‘Any animal can be reborn, but the souls of men are hard to change.’ You look so upstanding, and yet you have the heart of a thief! Your guilt is clear, no matter what you have to say!”
So the general had the evidence sealed and had Wu Song locked up in a room until he could be dealt with the next morning. Wu Song cried that he was innocent, but no one was listening. The soldiers took him and the evidence into a room and kept them there. Meanwhile, the general sent a messenger to alert the prefect that night. Oh and while he was there, the messenger made sure to drop off some silver, for, you know, no reason at all.
The next morning, the prefect held court and the inspectors brought Wu Song and the evidence into the courtroom. General Zhang’s confidant presented a letter from the general with the accusations. After reading the letter, the prefect barked for his men to tie Wu Song up and put him on the ground, while the jailers brought out a whole smattering of torture devices for interrogations.
Before Wu Song could even open his mouth, the prefect shouted, “This bastard was an exiled criminal, so thieving is in his nature. He must have gotten ideas when he saw the valuables. Since the evidence is clear, there’s no need to listen to his nonsense. Just beat him, hard!”
So the jailers raised their bamboo rods and started pelting Wu Song. After enduring sufficient torture, Wu Song recognized that there was no justice to be had here today, so he had no choice but to give a confession, stating that he got greedy when he saw all the silver vessels in the general’s private quarters, so he snuck in at night and stole them.
With signed confession in hand, the prefect said, “It’s clear that this bastard got greedy when he saw the valuables. Throw him in jail for now.”
The jailers brought over a long cangue and put it around Wu Song’s neck. They then dragged him into a cell in the dungeon.
As he languished in his cell, Wu Song realized that everything General Zhang had said to him and done for him had been a lie, and Wu Song swore that if he ever got out of this cell, the general would have something else coming to him. But the jailers had him chained up tight day and night, and he could barely move.
Word of Wu Song’s mishap soon made its way to his friend Shi En, and he quickly went to talk with his father, the old warden.
“This must be the doing of Commandant Zhang,” the old warden said. “He must be seeking revenge for Jiang Menshen, so he bribed General Zhang to lay this trap for Wu Song. They must have bribed everyone in the system. That’s why they didn’t even give him a chance to defend himself. They must be trying to kill him. But now that I think about it, his crime is not a capital offense. We must buy a few clerks and bailiffs so that they’ll keep him alive while he’s in jail. Then we can see what else we can do for him.”
So just to pause for some clarification here: There are two officials involved in this scheme whose last name was Zhang. One was the general who had just framed Wu Song, and the other a commandant. Remember that in the last episode, Shi En explained that the commandant was in charge of the soldiers at the penal colony, and that Jiang Menshen was one of his retainers. Now, the last name Zhang was rather common. It’s like having two guys named Smith, so the connection between the general and the commandant would not necessarily be immediately clear just based on their last names.
Now, back to the discussion between Shi En and his father about how to save Wu Song.
“I’m good friends with the bailiff,” Shi En said. “His name is Kang (1). How about I go beg him?”
“Wu Song is in jail because of you,” his father said. “If you don’t go save him now, what are you waiting for?”
So Shi En took a couple hundred taels of silver and went to see Bailiff Kang, but the bailiff was still at the jailhouse. Shi En asked the bailiff’s servants to go find him. Soon, the bailiff came home, and Shi En told him the backstory of the case.
“Brother, I’ll be honest with you,” Bailiff Kang said. “This is all the doing of General Zhang and Commandant Zhang. They share the same last name and are sworn brothers. Right now, Jiang Menshen is hiding in Commandant Zhang’s home, and he asked the commandant to bribe the general to devise this scheme. Everyone is in their pocket. Even WE got money from them. The prefect is working for them and will no doubt try to take Wu Song’s life. The only thing is that the clerk refuses to play along. His last name is Ye (4), and he is very loyal and honorable and refuses to harm commoners. That’s why Wu Song is still alive. Now that I’ve gotten the backstory from you, I will take care of everything in the jail. I’ll go easy on him and he will not suffer. You should send someone to go talk to the clerk as soon as possible and ask him to close the case quickly so that Wu Song’s life may be spared.”
Shi En thanked the bailiff and tried to give him 100 taels of silver. The bailiff steadfastly refused several times before relenting. Shi En then returned to the penal colony and sent someone who knew the magisterial clerk to deliver 100 taels of silver to him, with a request to close the case as soon as possible, before Wu Song met with any unfortunate accidents in jail.
That clerk knew Wu Song was a hero and wanted to go easy on him, so he had already watered down the case against him on paper. The prefect, meanwhile, had gladly taken the bribe from General Zhang and wanted to come down hard on Wu Song. But of course, stealing wasn’t a capital offense, and believe it or not, not even in the ancient Chinese legal system could you bend the law that far. So the matter dragged on, and the prefect and his conspirators were thinking that they would do away with Wu Song in jail, before the sentence was passed.
But now the clerk, with his overriding sense of justice buoyed by 100 taels of silver, did all he could to help Wu Song by reducing the charges and promising Shi En that he would get the sentence passed as soon as the requisite detention period was over. You know, two wrongs never made a right quite so much as using a bribe to counter a bribe to save the life of an innocent man who was in jail because he helped you wrestle back control of your protection-money racket.
Having secured some assurance of Wu Song’s safety, Shi En now prepared a healthy quantity of food and wine and followed the bailiff into the jailhouse to see his friend. By now, thanks to the bailiff, the security around Wu Song had been loosened, and Shi En made sure all the jailers there got some silver for looking the other way while he visited a prisoner, even though prisoners were not supposed to have any visitors.
As he handed Wu Song the food and wine, Shi En whispered in his ear, “This case was a trap to avenge Jiang Menshen. Don’t worry. My people have talked to the clerk, and he’s intent on helping you. He’s going to pass the sentence and get you out of here as quickly as he can, and then we can worry about the rest.”
Now, Wu Song had been harboring thoughts of attempting a jailbreak ever since he noticed the security getting lax, but after what Shi En told him, he put that idea on the backburner and waited for Shi En’s plan to play out. After consoling him for a bit, Shi En went back to the penal colony.
A couple days later, Shi En again returned with food and wine for Wu Song, and again he spread silver around to make sure the jailers kept quiet. When he came back, he sent his men to go push money into the right hands to expedite the legal process. A few days later, Shi En again returned to the jailhouse. He treated the jailers to wine, asking them to look after Wu Song. And then he gave Wu Song wine, food, and some fresh clothes.
But this spate of visits did not escape notice. One of Commandant Zhang’s men saw Shi En going into the jailhouse, and the guy told his boss, who then told General Zhang, who then sent some more money to the prefect. And next thing you know, there were inspectors dropping by the jailhouse for random inspections and harassing anyone who didn’t work there. So Shi En did not dare to go visit Wu Song anymore. Still, Wu Song had the bailiff and the jailers looking after him, and Shi En got updates on his friend from the bailiff.
As the case reached the two-month mark, the clerk kept making the case for Wu Song to the prefect. At the same time, the prefect heard through the grapevine that General Zhang, the plaintiff in the case, had received his share of money from Jiang Menshen to instigate all this, and the prefect got to thinking, “Oh, so you are getting paid for this, and you want ME to do your dirty work!” And in that light, the bribes that the prefect had received all the sudden seemed insufficient, so the prefect dropped his insistence on a harsh sentence.
To see what sentence Wu Song will get, tune in to the next episode of the Water Margin Podcast. Also on the next episode, what do you think will happen if and when Wu Song got the chance to confront the folks who did him in? Yeah. So join us next time. Thanks for listening!
Major Characters in This Episode
| Last Name | First Name | Chinese Name | Pronunciation | Nickname(s) | Job | Weapon | First appeared in episode | Wikipedia Entry | Picture |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Wǔ | Sōng | 武松 | Constable | Pair of sabers, staff | 32 | Wikipedia Entry | Pic | ||
| Shī | Ēn | 施恩 | Golden Eyed Tiger Cub (金眼彪) | Prison warden | 41 | Wikipedia Entry | Pic | ||
| Jiǎng | Ménshén | 蒋门神 | Tavern owner | 42 | |||||
| Zhāng | Méngfāng | 张蒙方 | Garrison general | 43 |
Music in This Episode
- “Chinese Ways” by Michael Adels (intro and outro)
- “Dark Toys” by SYBS (from YouTube audio library)
- “St. Francis” by Josh Lippi & The Overtimers (from YouTube audio library)
- “Inescapable” by Ugonna Onyekwe (from YouTube audio library)
- “Slow Times Over Here” by Midnight North (from YouTube audio library)