Meet the heroes of Clear Winds Mountain, who turn unsuspecting passers-by into soup and abduct and defile women on their way to visit their parents’ graves.
Transcript
Welcome to the Water Margin Podcast. This is episode 47.
Last time, we wrapped up the Wu Song story arc for now and resumed the Song Jiang storyline. When we last left him, Song Jiang was on his way to Fort Clear Winds to stay with the fort’s commandant, Hua Rong, who was a buddy of his. But along the way, he ran into trouble on Clear Winds Mountain. He got snagged by a group of bandits, who brought him to their stronghold, tied him to a post, and were preparing to use his innards to make their leader some soup.
When 11 o’clock rolled around that night, a few bandit lackeys rushed out from the back and yelled, “The boss is up!” They then lit even more lamps to brighten the room. Soon, their chieftain stepped into the thatched parlor and sat down in the middle command chair. This guy wore a turban, bound in place by a red silk ribbon, and he had on a red padded tunic. He had red hair, yellow beard, long arms, and a wide waist.
“Where did you boys catch this ox?” the chieftain asked the lackeys.
“We set an ambush on the back of the mountain and heard a bell ring. Turns out it was this ox, traveling alone and carrying some bundles. He tripped a wire and fell, so we caught him and brought him to make you some wake-up soup.”
“Excellent! Quick, go invite my two brothers to join me.”
The lackeys ran off and returned momentarily with two other chieftains. The one on the left was short with bright eyes. The one on the right had a clear complexion with a short mustache and goatee. And both sported red headscarves.
The three sat down, and the short chieftain said to the lackeys, “Boys, some wake-up soup would be perfect right now. Hurry up and cut out that ox’s heart and make three bowls of sweet and sour soup.”
Immediately, a lackey rolled up his sleeve and approached Song Jiang with a sharp dagger. Meanwhile, another lackey started splashing Song Jiang’s chest with cold water. The idea behind this was that they believed the heart was surrounded by hot blood, and the cold water would disperse the warm blood so that when you cut out the heart, it would be nice and crisp.
When the lackey started splashing water on Song Jiang’s face, Song Jiang sighed and lamented out loud, “What a pity that Song Jiang will meet his end here.”
When the head chieftain caught the name “Song Jiang,” he quickly ordered his lackeys to hold on for a second and asked them, “What did that guy say about Song Jiang?”
“He said, ‘What a pity that Song Jiang will meet his end here.’ ” the lackeys answered.
The head chieftain now stood up, approached Song Jiang, and asked him, “Do you know Song Jiang?”
“I AM Song Jiang.”
The head chieftain came closer and asked, “Which Song Jiang are you?”
“I am the Song Jiang who was a magisterial clerk in Yuncheng County.”
“Are you the Song Jiang they call Timely Rain, the one who killed Yan Poxi and fled?”
“How did you know? That’s me indeed,” Song Jiang said.
The head chieftain was taken aback, and he wrested the dagger from his lackey and quickly cut the ropes binding Song Jiang. He then took off his own cloak and wrapped it around Song Jiang and helped him sit down in the center chair. Next, he told his two fellow chieftains to get up, and all three of them kneeled and kowtowed to their former meal.
Song Jiang hurriedly got up to return the greeting and asked as he also kneeled, “Heroes, why did you not kill me and instead show me such respect?”
The three chieftains remained kneeling in front of him, and the head chieftain said, “I should cut out my own eyes with this dagger! I was so blind and did not recognize a good man. I wasn’t thinking and didn’t ask enough questions and almost killed a hero. If heaven had not compelled you to mention your great name, how could we have found out the important details! I have spent more than 10 years on the jianghu scene among outlaws, and have long heard of your reputation as a man of honor and generosity who helps those in need. But I had not had the good fortune to make your acquaintance. Today, heaven has given me this opportunity, and my wish has been fulfilled.”
So let’s actually introduce these three bandit chieftains, since they’ll stick around for a while. The leader’s name is Yan (4) Shun (4), and he’s nicknamed the Multicolored Tiger, on account of his red hair and yellow beard. He used to be a dealer in sheep and horses, but when that business went bust, he went broke and ended up a bandit.
As for his two comrades, the short guy was named Wang (2) Ying (1). Because of his diminutive stature, people called him the Stumpy Tiger. He used to be a cart driver, but one time while he was transporting a merchant, he found the guy’s merchandise a bit too tempting, so he robbed the man. He was arrested, but later broke out of prison and found his way to this Clear Winds Mountain to join up with Yan (4) Shun (4) and his gang of outlaws.
The third chieftain, the guy with the clear complexion, was named Zheng (4) Tianshou (1,4). Because of his good looks, people called him the Fair-Faced Gentleman. He was a silversmith by trade and loved playing with staffs and spears ever since he was a kid. He was drifting around the jianghu scene when he came across Clear Winds Mountain. The aforementioned Wang Ying, the Stumpy Tiger, tried to rob him and they ended up fighting for 50-some bouts without a winner. Appreciating his skills, Yan Shun asked Zheng (4) Tianshou (1,4) to join them as the No. 3 chieftain.
Now that we’ve gotten the introductions out of the way, let’s rejoin the Song Jiang admiration society meeting currently in progress. While Song Jiang was doing the “Oh I don’t deserve such respect” bit, the head chieftain Yan Shun told him, “Brother, you treat talented men with courtesy and welcome men of honor. Your name is known and revered throughout the land. Everyone has heard about the recent ascendency of Liangshan, and they say it’s all because of you. But what are you doing here alone?”
So Song Jiang recounted how he had saved Chao Gai, killed his mistress, and fled to seek shelter, first with Chai Jin and then with Old Squire Kong (3), and how he was now on his way to see Hua Rong, the commandant of Fort Clear Winds. The chieftains were delighted to hear his story and they gave him a fresh set of clothes and told their men to prepare a feast right away, even though it was the middle of the night. They ate and drank until 5 a.m. before Song Jiang retired. The next morning, Song Jiang got up around 9 a.m. and resumed his conversation with the chieftains. He told them about what a hero his buddy Wu Song was, and the three chieftains stamped their feet and lamented, “What rotten luck! It would be perfect if he had come here. Instead, he’s headed elsewhere.”
Anyway, in the blink of an eye, five or six days had passed, and every day was a nonstop mutual admiration party. It was now the beginning of the 12th and final month of the year on the Chinese lunar calendar, and it was a time when people of the region typically went to offer sacrifices at the graves of their ancestors, many of which were in the mountains. So that day, while Song Jiang and his new friends were drinking, some lackeys came to report that there was a sedan chair, accompanied by seven or eight men, coming this way along the main road. They were carrying a couple boxes and looked to be on their way to go burn paper money at someone’s ancestor’s graves.
Hearing this, the No. 2 chieftain, Wang Ying the Stumpy Tiger, quickly rose and said he’ll go conduct some transactions with this group. He called up about 50 men and set off immediately, despite attempts by Song Jiang and the bandit leader Yan Shun to restrain him.
So why the big hurry? Well, this Wang Ying was a rather lecherous fella, and when he heard that the passing entourage included a sedan chair, he figured the occupant of the sedan chair must be a woman. So he rushed off, while Song Jiang and the other two chieftains remained in the bandit stronghold and continued drinking.
About four or five hours later, a scout came back and said, “Chieftain Wang chased off the guards and captured a woman who was in the sedan chair. They only had a box of incense, nothing else.”
“Where is that woman now?” Yan Shun asked.
“Chieftain Wang has already brought her to his quarters,” the scout said.
Yan Shun started laughing at the thought of this impending act of sexual assault, but Song Jiang said, “Turns out Brother Wang lusts after women. That is not the action of a hero.”
“Well, that brother of mine is good in everything else, except for this failing,” Yan Shun said.
“You two, please come with me to talk some sense into him,” Song Jiang said.
So Yan Shun and Zheng Tianshou accompanied Song Jiang to Wang YIng’s quarters on the back side of the mountain. They went in and saw Wang Ying clutching the woman in his arms, about to force himself on her. As soon as he saw them come in, though, he pushed her aside and asked his friends to sit.
Song Jiang took a look at that woman. She was quite pretty, despite wearing plain-color clothes and no makeup.
“Miss, whose wife are you? Why are you out and about?” Song Jiang asked.
The woman approached him shyly and curtsied three times and said, “I am the wife of the commandant of Fort Clear Winds. This is the first anniversary of my mother’s death, and I was on my way to burn paper money at her grave. Otherwise I would never dare to be out and about. My lord, please save me!”
When he heard this, Song Jiang was taken aback. He thought, “I’m on my way to see Commandant Hua Rong. If she’s his wife, how can I not save her?”
“Why did your husband Hua Rong not accompany you?” he asked.
“My lord, I am not Commandant Hua’s wife.”
“But you just said you are the wife of the commandant of Fort Clear Winds.”
“My lord, you misunderstood. Right now there are two commandants at Fort Clear Winds, one handling the civil affairs and the other overseeing the military affairs. Commandant Hua oversees the military one, while my husband, Commandant Liu (2) Gao (1), oversees the civil matters.
Song Jiang thought to himself, “Since her husband is Hua Rong’s colleague, if I don’t save her, it won’t look good when I get to his place tomorrow.”
So Song Jiang said to Wang Ying, “I have something to say, but I don’t know if you will do as I ask.”
“Brother, just say it. No problem at all,” Wang Ying replied.
“Any hero who ‘wastes his marrow’ becomes a laughingstock,” Song Jiang said. “And this woman is the wife of a government official. For my sake, and the sake of the honor of the jianghu fraternity, how about you let her go so she can reunite with her husband?”
To this, Wang Ying said, “Brother, I have never had a wife to keep me company. And those big-hat high officials are the cause of all the trouble in this world. Why should you give a damn about her husband? Just indulge me on this one.”
But Song Jiang now kneeled and said, “Brother, if you want a wife, then in the future I will pick a good one for you and provide the dowry. But this lady is the wife of my friend’s colleague. Please do me a favor and release her.”
Check, and mate. The sight of their VIP on his knees was too much for the other two chieftains, and they intervened. Yan Shun helped Song Jiang to his feet and summoned the two sedan chair carriers and told them to take their mistress and leave, Wang Ying’s wishes be damned. When she heard that, the woman bowed to Song Jiang nonstop and kept saying, “Thank you my lord!”
“Madam, you don’t need to thank me, and I am not the chieftain of this stronghold,” Song Jiang said. “I’m just a merchant from Yuncheng County.”
Given a new lease on life, the two sedan chair carriers got their mistress into the chair and flew off the mountain, wishing the whole time that they had a couple extra legs so they could move faster.
Meanwhile, as he watched his prize vanish down the mountain, Wang Ying was both embarrassed and melancholy, and he did not say a word. But Song Jiang pulled him into the front parlor and consoled him, telling him, “Brother, don’t worry. One way or another, I will help you find a good wife to cheer you up. I will not break my word.”
The other two chieftains started laughing when they heard this, and Wang Ying, although still mad, had no answer to Song Jiang’s courteous entreaties, so he had to swallow his displeasure and laugh along with everyone else. They then went back to feasting.
Meanwhile, let’s jump on over to Fort Clear Winds. The soldiers who had accompanied the commandant’s wife on her journey had fled the moment Wang Ying attacked. Seeing the bandits make off with the boss’s wife, they rushed back to the fort to report this to the commandant, Liu Gao. Liu Gao flew into a rage and scolded the men for being useless and wanted to beat them.
“But there were only six or seven of us and the bandits had 30-some people,” the men pleaded. “How could we be a match for them?”
“Bullcrap!” Liu Gao fumed. “If you don’t go rescue my wife right now, I’ll throw all of you in jail and punish you!”
Left with no recourse, the soldiers called up about 80 other men and headed back to Clear Winds Mountain to try their luck. Turns out, luck was on their side this day. Midway to the mountain, they saw the two sedan chair carriers racing back this way with the chair and their mistress.
“How did y’all get away?!” the soldiers asked once they greeted their mistress.
“Those bandits took me to their stronghold, but when I told them I was the wife of Commandant Liu, they were so scared that they kowtowed to me and released me,” she said, with just a little revisionism thrown in.
“Mistress, please take pity on us,” the soldiers now begged her. “Please tell the master that we rescued you, so he would spare us a beating.”
“I know what to say,” she told them.
The soldiers kowtowed and thanked her, and then they escorted her back toward the fort. As they traveled, the soldiers saw how fast the sedan chair carriers were walking, so they asked them, “You two always waddle along like ducks when you’re carrying this chair in town. How come you are going so fast today?”
“We’re actually pretty tired,” the chair bearers replied, “but someone keeps punching us in the back of the head, so we have to keep moving.”
“You must be seeing ghosts,” the others laughed. “There’s nobody behind you!”
Only now did the two men turn back and look.
“Ah!” they exclaimed. “We were running in such a panic that our heels were kicking up and drumming the backs of our heads!”
When the entourage returned to the fort, the commandant Liu Gao was delighted to see his wife back unharmed. He asked her how she got away, and she told him, “After those bandits abducted me, they didn’t rape me. They were just about to kill me, but I told them I was your wife, so they did not dare to harm me and instead kowtowed to me. And then these men came and rescued me.”
When he heard that, Liu Gao rewarded his men with 10 bottles of wine, and that was that.
Back on Clear Winds Mountain, after another five or six days, Song Jiang decided it was time to resume his journey to see Hua Rong. The three chieftains tried hard to keep him but could not, so they prepared a going-away feast and gave Song Jiang some travel money. That morning, after he washed up and ate breakfast, Song Jiang packed his bundle and took his leave. But the three chieftains escorted him for a good seven or eight miles, with a banquet in tow, until they reached the main thoroughfare, where they finally bid goodbye to each other over a bowl of wine.
“Brother, after you visit Fort Clear Winds, be sure to come back here and stay a while longer,” the chieftains told Song Jiang.
“I will see you again,” he said as he picked up his bundle and his long-handle broadsword. He gave a deep bow and then hit the road.
Clear Winds Mountain was not far from Qingzhou (1,1) Prefecture. They were only about 30-some miles apart. Fort Clear Winds sat at a fork in the road on the way to Qingzhou, next to a small town called — what else? — Clear Winds Town. Now, the road split in three directions here, and in each direction, there was a mountain controlled by bandits. That’s why the government set up the fort here. There were about 5,000 households living in this town, which sat only a short ride from Clear Winds Mountain.
That day, Song Jiang made his way into Clear Winds Town and asked for directions to Commandant Hua Rong’s residence. Some townsfolk told him, “The administrative offices of Fort Clear Winds are in the center of town. On the south side of town there is a small fort. That’s the home of Liu Gao, the civil commandant. There is also a small fort on the north side of town, and that’s where Hua Rong, the military commandant, resides.”
So Song Jiang headed to the northern fort. Upon arrival, he introduced himself to the guards out front, and they went inside to announce him. Momentarily, a young officer rushed out, took Song Jiang by the arms, and kneeled. This was none other than Hua Rong. He had white teeth, ruby red lips, sharp eyes, and delicate eyebrows. His waist was narrow and his shoulders broad. He was a skilled rider and warrior, and was especially adept at archery. In fact, he was so good with the bow and arrow that people gave him the moniker Little Li (2) Guang (3), comparing him to a famous general who lived some 1,200 years before the time of our story and was renowned for his archery prowess.
After greeting Song Jiang, Hua Rong told his men to carry Song Jiang’s stuff, while he led Song Jiang by the arm into the main parlor. There, Hua Rong asked Song Jiang to sit down on a bamboo couch, and then he kowtowed four more times before rising to his feet and saying, “Brother, it’s been six years since we parted, and I’ve missed you so much. When I heard you had killed some harlot and that the authorities were after you, I was on pins and needles. I sent more than 10 letters to your family’s manor to inquire about you. Did you receive them? And now, you’re here. It’s heaven-sent. Being able to see you again is my lifelong wish fulfilled.”
At that, Hua Rong was about to kneel and kowtow again, but Song Jiang held him up and said, “Brother, enough with the courtesies. Please sit and I will tell you what happened.”
So Song Jiang recounted his adventures since killing his mistress, all the way through his encounter with the bandits on Clear Winds Mountain. When he was done, Hua Rong said, “Brother, you have suffered much. But now that you are here, just stay here for a few years, and then worry about it.”
“If my brother Song Qing had not written to me to urge me to visit Old Squire Kong, I would have come to see you earlier,” Song Jiang said.
Hua Rong now invited Song Jiang to his private quarters and called his wife and sister out to pay their respects to Song Jiang. Then he asked Song Jiang to take a bath and change clothes, and then held a welcome banquet in his private quarters.
As they were feasting, Song Jiang recounted how he had intervened to save Liu Gao’s wife after the bandits had abducted her. But when he heard this, Hua Rong furrowed his brow and said, “Brother, why did you have to help that woman? That was the perfect chance to shut her up.”
“Well that’s strange,” Song Jiang said. “I heard she say that she was the wife of the commandant of Fort Clear Winds, so I intervened for your sake and saved her against Wang Ying’s wishes. Why would you say such a thing?”
“Brother, you don’t understand,” Hua Rong explained. “I’m not bragging, but this fort is a key location in Qingzhou Prefecture. If I were still commanding this fort by myself, how would bandits from near and far dare to raid so freely around here? But recently, they sent that greedy, contemptible Liu Gao to be my superior. And he’s a civil official, with no skills at all. All he’s done since taking office is squeeze the property-holders in the nearby villages and disrespect the law. There’s nothing he won’t do. I am a military officer under him, and I have to put up with all his crap. Sometimes I get so angry I wish I could kill that filthy, corrupt beast. Why did you have to save his wife? That woman is also no good. All she does is instigate her husband to do dishonorable things, harm civilians, and embezzle wealth. You should’ve let that harlot get humiliated instead of saving her.”
Song Jiang, however, told Hua Rong, “Brother, you are mistaken. As the old saying goes, ‘The knot of hatred should be opened, not tightened.’ You and Liu Gao are colleagues. Even if he has made some mistakes, you should be the bigger man and take the high road. Don’t be so shortsighted.”
“You’re quite right, brother,” Hua Rong said. “The next time I see Commandant Liu, I’ll mention how you saved his wife.”
“And that would be to your advantage,” Song Jiang pointed out.
The rest of the night proceeded uneventfully, as Hua Rong and his family tended to Song Jiang with the utmost courtesy before turning in. That was followed by more feasting the next day, and the next, and the next, and so on and so forth.
Before you knew it, four or five days had passed. Each day, Hua Rong would give one of his trusted men some silver and have him accompany Song Jiang out on the town to check out the various sights and sounds. This Clear Winds Town had several small entertainment centers, plus a number of tea houses and taverns. So each day, Song Jiang and his escort would spend some time watching a show or two at the entertainment center, then go take a tour of some nearby village, monastery, temple, or what have you, and then go for a drink at one of the taverns. And when it came time to pay the bill, even though his escorts would try to pick up the tab, Song Jiang absolutely refused to let them. And of course, he never told Hua Rong that he was paying. So this was a pretty nice gig for Hua Rong’s men — just go show this VIP a good time every day, and you end up pocketing some silver, too. Needless to say, everyone around Hua Rong’s fort soon became a member of the Song Jiang fan club.
In this way, time flew by, and soon more than a month had passed, the new year had rolled around and the Lantern Festival, which was the 15th day of the first month, was approaching. This was one of the big holidays of the year, and to celebrate, the people of the town were going all out. They all chipped in some money and were going to erect the framework of a turtle-shaped hill in front of the local temple to the King of the Earth. On this framework, they were going to hang about 700 colored lanterns, and top it all off with bunting and streamers. In the temple courtyard, there would be various games, and in front of everyone’s home, there would be trellises from which people would hang beautiful lanterns. Every shop in the town market would be offering its own form of amusement. All this may not be on par with the festivities in the capital, but to the people of the town, it was like heaven on earth.
On the day of the festival, Song Jiang and Hua Rong were sharing a bowl of wine in the fort. The weather was really nice. Around midmorning, Hua Rong rode down to headquarters and called up several hundred soldiers, dispatching them to go into town that evening to maintain order. He also assigned a squad to guard the gates of the fort.
Early that afternoon, Hua Rong returned and invited Song Jiang to lunch. As they ate, Song Jiang said, “I heard they are lighting lanterns in town tonight; I would like to go take a look.”
“I wish I could go with you, brother,” Hua Rong said. “But I am on duty and cannot accompany you. I will send a few of my attendants to go with you. Just come back early. I will be preparing a feast for you to celebrate the holiday.”
Well, as it turns out, this night out on the town would not go quite as Song Jiang expected. To see what surprises he will run into, tune in to the next episode of the Water Margin Podcast. Also on the next episode, Hua Rong demonstrates how to resolve workplace conflicts with your boss — with your bow and arrow. So join us next time. Thanks for listening!
Major Characters in This Episode
| Last Name | First Name | Chinese Name | Pronunciation | Nickname(s) | Job | Weapon | First appeared in episode | Wikipedia Entry | Picture |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Sòng | Jiāng | 宋江 | Protector of Righteousness (呼保義), Timely Rain (及時雨) | Magistrate's clerk | Wikipedia Entry | Pic | |||
| Huā | Róng | 花荣 | Little Li Guang (小李廣) | Military officer | Spear; Bow and arrows | 47 | Wikipedia Entry | Pic | |
| Yān | Shùn | 燕顺 | Multicoloured Tiger (錦毛虎) | Bandit leader | Saber | 47 | Wikipedia Entry | Pic | |
| Wāng | Yīng | 王英 | Stumpy Tiger (矮腳虎) | Bandit leader | 47 | Wikipedia Entry | Pic | ||
| Zhèng | Tiānshòu | 郑天寿 | Fair Skinned Gentleman (白面郎君) | Bandit leader | 47 | Wikipedia Entry | Pic | ||
| Liú | Gāo | 刘高 | Commander of Qingfeng Fort | 47 |
Music in This Episode
- “Chinese Ways” by Michael Adels (intro and outro)
- “Dark Toys” by SYBS (from YouTube audio library)
- “Tumbleweed Texas” by Chris Haugen (from YouTube audio library)